Monsters inside our heads

Have you ever heard those little voices telling you strange things? Have you ever heard those little voices telling you to give up, that you’re not worth it, you are useless, that nobody on this earth loves you? Have you ever those little voices that offers you a certain solution to your never-ending problems in life, in one slash your agony will fade away. If you do or anyone dear to you does, then it’s a big trouble.

I know this is not yet a big issue in our country compared to other, but we could just put a dot to it just yet, cause those voices, those little voices running inside our heads might be the biggest enemy one can face in their lives. Those are the monsters who resides in our heads, monsters that we cannot see but we can hear, cannot be harmed with any weapon but can harm you without even touch you. No age, gender, or status, they never choose. As long as you are a human being; living, breathing, has a heart full of regret and a mind filled with guilt, you are a potential victim of this monsters, making you gloomy, out of your normal self, making you depressed and down at everything. Brutally beating you up to a pulp with all the mistakes you had done, tormenting you with painful words that nobody else can hear but you. Driving you to the point where you wanted to stop them by hurting yourself little by little until it drives you to commit suicide. Yes, you heard it right, suicide.

Suicide, such a tragic word, isn’t it? Deny it or not, we are all familiar with this word. How? Simply because we could hear it in the news or read about it on books or on the net. And even without looking at the dictionary, we can define it through our own words without asking if it is right or wrong. The act of ending one’s own life or in its simplest definition, ending your own life. We had been familiarized, exposed to this kind of tragedy but sad to say that despite of the action, campaign and other programs, it is still not enough to reach everybody all around the world. When there are a lot of ways to prevent them for harming themselves and eventually, ending their own life by their own hands. One simple way is using your own voice to spread information that can help and save thousands of lives.

 Many people, mostly around my age (13-21) all around the world. have been battling with this monster for a period of time. Sad to say that many of them already raised a white flag, and end their lives in tragic way. And there are a lot more that might end up the same.

I had experienced in my life where in I encountered a  possible suicidal person. He is a friend of mine. One time, I noticed that he is not his usual self at school. That night, I was shocked when he chatted me opening a strange topic which is very unusual. He started taking about how he was tired of living and started opening a little bit, but still I can feel that he is still hold-back. I was trying to cheer him up a bit but it seemed that it didn’t work. I told him that I’m here for him so does the others. But his reply made me furious at him, he was pushing us away and telling me that I’m not his friend and no one does. I was mad at him that time, I cursed him and told him that he is worthless. Which was one of the biggest mistake I’ve done that night. I let my emotions rule over me. I been so stupid that night, I didn’t even consider the fact that he is going through something… I should had been a better friend who should have offered him a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on to.

The next day, I was surprised to see that he is different from the person I was talking to the other night, the exact opposite. I might actually think that he got over with it but... in some cases in other people, that might not be applicable. because that sudden mood swing can be a sign that person is at risk in having a suicide.

There are a lot more signs to watch out for especially if  you suspected them to be the suicidal type. some of them and the most common are: they're always talking or thinking about death, having clinical depression -- deep sadness, loss of interest, having trouble in sleeping and in eating which can gets worse. He/she is having a "death wish," tempting fate by taking risks that could lead to death, such as driving fast or running red lights. He?she is also losing  interest in things they once  used to care about. The person frequently making comments about being hopeless, helpless, or worthless or saying things like "it would be better if I wasn't here" or "I want out" or even talking about suicide or killing one's self. That person is putting affairs in order, tying up loose ends, changing a will. Just like I had mention earlier, that person has a sudden, unexpected switch from being very sad to being very calm or appearing to be happy and that person is visiting or calling people close to that person to say goodbye. And there are more signs than this.

Prevention is better than cure that's what they usually say. If therefore prevention is a lot more better, then there are ways for you to help them prevent them from hurting themselves. If majority of the signs are present from your love ones or if you’re having a friend, a family member or some who is dear to you is undergoing through this, (in my opinion) here are some things you can do to help them and are also things or tips you need to remember especially when you are dealing with a suicidal person:

Never leave them, stay by their side. The might push you away but that is how they are. Inside the mind of a suicidal person, no one loves them. They are worthless, forever alone and nobody’s there for them. Show them that you care for them. That you love them. Make them feel that they are not alone, that they are loved, they’re worth something more valuable. That they are somebody rather than a nobody. Make them feel that they are special.

Lend them an ear and give them a shoulder to cry on. They might say they don’t need you. That they don’t need your help. But don’t be deceive by those words. Remember, a suicidal person drives everyone around them away because they set on their mind that no one can help them. Make them feel that you are here for them. That you are ready to listen to them.

Be patient and understanding. A suicidal person tends to be stubborn. The will not listen to you no matter what you do. Be patient and try to understand them. Don’t argue with them or even say negative things to them. It might trigger them to continue committing suicide. Remember that it will takes time for them to heal.

Cheer them up, by using positive compliments. Avoid the negative ones. Telling them everything’s going to be alright. But still, try to be sensitive from time to time. You might have said something that might worse things up instead of cheering them up. Be cautious, and sensitive enough on your words. Think twice before you speak to them. Most of them are very sensitive.

If possible, let the family member know his/her situation. A strong family relationship can help the victim overcome his/her situation. Some of the suicidal people are seeking for love from their own family, maybe because they couldn’t feel or see it. Showing them that his/her family cares for him/her and also that they love him/her, it would give the victim some more will to live and to carry on.

And lastly, I know this is somehow unusual, but I’ll still suggest this, somehow cheer them up by giving them a hug.  Sometimes all we need is a hug. Giving them, a hug can cheer them up. It shows them that you love them, you are here for them, that you care for them and that you accept them for who and what they are.

I know my friend is a strong person, and luckily, with the help of the people around him, he overcome it and now he is living a healthy life . And I’m really proud of him for not trying to cross the line even if I had done something that can make him down even more. And I know to myself that I did a big mistake in dealing with him… and what I did is something we couldn’t do to another suicidal person we met. Because it will trigger them more to take their own lives. I know somewhere out there, there are people who suffers from this, covering their ears from hearing those painful words that tormenting them, keeping their eyes shut from seeing the reality that’s breaking them apart. Shutting their doors, and isolating themselves from the world. Those who are lost in the dark; be their light who’ll shine their way. Guide them. Let your warm voices pass through their hearts. Let your voice be heard. Let them know that you care for them, you’re here for them and that you love them for who and what they are. Let us help them overcome the little voices tormenting them for a long time. Let us help them live a better and healthy life. Let us help in stopping suicide, helping them before it’s too late…